By David Peel
I’ve often said that people will forgive mistakes of your head as long as they still trust the intent of your heart.
If you are trying to do the right thing and fail, that is far different from trying to get by with something and being found out. I see this not only in lawsuits and various negotiations, but I’ve even seen it in college sports.
Take former Notre Dame coach Brian Kelly. He went down to LSU and was announced with great fanfare. Now, he is not by any stretch of the imagination a southerner, let alone a Cajun. And he had one opportunity to make a first impression. And I don’t know how I would’ve imagined it would’ve gone, but I would’ve suspected he would have explained that he’s a Yankee but he loves Cajun food and he loves the people and he will do his best to get acclimated.
But instead, he went down there and tried to feign a southern accent by making the word “family” have multiple syllables it doesn’t really have. And those of us who are good at spotting a fraud immediately identified that. And it is the one image that will follow him the rest of his days. Why? Because it wasn’t a mistake of the head. He didn’t use the wrong word —that’s a mistake. He didn’t forget somebody’s name— that’s a mistake. He tried to be something he’s not— that’s not real. And that is the part that is an insight into somebody’s heart.
People will forgive you much more readily if you are brutally honest. If he had explained that he doesn’t understand a lot of what people are saying and that he might need closed captioning when he talks to people, it would’ve been funny. If he had just said that he’s gonna have to redefine what he thought was spicy hot food now that he’s eaten some Cajun food, people would’ve loved it. And if he had just said that he hopes nobody views him as some carpet bagger from up north, he might have become a favorite son of Louisiana one day, as that could be sincere.
And so it is in lawsuits as well. I have a case that I’ll never forget, where a man rear-ended my client but insisted it was not his fault. After quite a bit of time and a lot of questioning, I finally had him admit that he was in charge of his speed, he was in charge of his following distance, and he was in charge of his lookout.
If he would have said I wasn’t paying attention and I ran into the rear of her, the deposition would’ve been over in minutes. People can sense whether you’re real or not. You can be real and still not know everything. You can be real and be ultimately wrong about something. But if you’re not real, people can smell it.
Peel seeks justice for those injured in tractor trailer and car accidents, medical malpractice, and disability. He often addresses churches, clubs and groups without charge. Peel may be reached through PeelLawFirm.com wherein other articles may be accessed.
